News Flash: Homicides are Baned in Los Angeles, But Only for the Next 40 Hours

The always brilliant Los Angeles lawmakers have decided that having homicides actually illegal to commit isn’t enough to get people to stop the violence, what we need is to waste more time debating and setting resolutions to make homicides symbolically a bad thing.

Plans changed though, today, after the City Council debated for 45 minutes and came to the amazing revolution that “opposition to homicides should last more than a single weekend.”

Really? It should? And all this time I thought that homicides were already something that we were all in opposition to.

“A moratorium on violence and killing is something we should support 365 days a year and every minute we live,” said Councilman Richard Alarcon, who represents part of the San Fernando Valley.

Thank you Councilman Richard Obviouscon for that amazing tidbit of information.

The symbolic ban on homicides had been proposed by Los Angeles author and political commentator Earl Ofari Hutchinson, who had urged the city to make a bold statement about the recent increase in homicides.

Shouldn’t we aim for this every day? And, outside of aiming for this goal, shouldn’t the actual response be policing the streets and incarcerating violent offenders for long amounts of jail time?

I’m amazed that you would actually have to voice a “ban on homicides.” Isn’t that typically a given amongst civilized societies?

Written on April 2, 2008 at roughly 4:12 pm. And by roughly I mean at that exact time.

2 Comments

mle April 3, 2008 at roughly 3:04 pm

That looks like a piece of copy for April 1 that accidentally got published a day late. Somehow I think that “prison” and “death penalty” would be more effective anti-homicide rhetoric than “moratorium.” How many products of LA public schools even know what that means.

Aaron April 3, 2008 at roughly 3:33 pm

I agree completely.

Go ahead and comment. I won't make fun of you too much.