Christmas Reflection

Christmas is a great time. People are busy thinking of others, you get out of the house and see friends and family, you eat too much, and then you go home and rest up for all your New Year’s Eve plans.

Living in Orlando with my family in California means that I shop for all my presents the week before Christmas in California, rather than shopping and packing all my presents in suitcases. I was able to get all of my shopping done in time, which was fantastic.

While out running around and thinking of all the great stuff I wanted to by my family, I started to think more about the act of giving. Why was I giving my family all these things they wanted but didn’t need? Was it to see the excitement on their faces? Was it to make myself look good in their eyes? Was it a selfish act, trying to out give everyone else?

With some honest reflection, I’d have to say that it was all of those, and for the most part, that’s disappointing.

I’m grateful that I’ve been blessed with gifts enough to work a job that I find fulfilling, and to make a living at it. Above and beyond that, I’m able to make enough money at this job to pay my bills, save some money, and buy stuff I don’t need but makes me happy (for a moment).

Out of all my thinking, I’ve decided to start the New Year out in a different—and polar opposite—fashion.

For the month of January, I’m not spending any money. Period.

Well, maybe not period, but pretty darn close. I’m going to pay my bills, write my rent check, cover my insurance, all the stuff I actually have to pay for. Then, I’m going to buy groceries and cook everything.

I’m not going to buy another Moleskine I don’t need at Barnes & Noble. I’m not going to pay $12 to see a movie that I really am not that interested in to begin with. I’m not going to eat Chick-Fil-A three times a week.

I’m going to be as sparse financially as possible. My hope in all this is to change my focus. I want to truly be able to look at how much God has blessed me with and see how horrible a steward I have been with it all. This isn’t a criticism of having too much, but the complete opposite. I want to make myself aware of how blessed I am and how I can better serve God with what he has blessed me with.

The average person lives on $18 a day. I find it fascinating that I have become so selfish and absorbed in the trappings of glitter and gold. I need to focus and change what I really find value in.

So, with some prayer and focus I am going to make myself see what I really should be grateful for and really see how much I’ve been blessed with. I hope that through my month of financial fasting, I will more clearly see Jesus and His working in my life.

Wish me luck!